"Hey Fatso!"

Careful with your words.

Oct 25, 2023

In 1991, my father married my step-mom Janice, and I spent half of the reception in tears…

But not because of the wedding itself.

I was actually really happy for them and super excited for that special day (and they’re still going strong and enjoying life together after 30+ years)!

I was in hysterics because I, that chubby ring bearer, was indulging in a table full of sweets when my grandfather shouted over, “Hey Fatso, save some dessert for the rest of us!”

And I lost it.

I know my grandpa, “Poppa Jerry”, loved me, and truly meant no harm.

But there was harm.

To this day, despite years of working on myself, I still have feelings of insecurity and body dysmorphia creep in.

And, isn’t it interesting that, of all our memories, we so often remember the worst? Only through looking at photos from the day did I remember that I actually gave a toast at the wedding!

Perhaps that’s survival mode at its best, haunting us with painful memories in an attempt to shield us from feeling weakness or shame again.

And I share this with you today for two reasons…

1. If you are bullying (and as was the case with Poppa Jerry, you may not even realize you’re doing it)…begin to notice what you’re doing and stop it.

Words may mean nothing to the enlightened, self-actualized person, but to mere mortals like you, me, and especially children, words can be extremely powerful.

Our words are our choice…they can be inspiring and uplifting or extremely damaging.

Choose your words wisely and practice spreading love, not hate, ridicule, or fear

2. If you haven’t gone back into your past to investigate what has made you “you”, it’s time.

I’m not saying to relive the trauma, but instead to acknowledge it so you can move through it. Shining the light of awareness begins to eliminate the darkness.

This is how we grow and heal.

It’s also the path of forgiveness that leads to valuable insight, for as Dr. Joe Dispenza says, “A memory without the emotional charge is wisdom.”

Meditation, writing exercises, coaching programs, and deep breathwork sessions can all help facilitate this (reach out to Alisa regarding the breathwork piece…she’s working on some fascinating stuff in this area).

We ALL have experienced pain and trauma, and it’s something that can unite us in awareness or continue to divide us in repression.

It’s YOUR call…it always is. Do the inner work and use your word for good.

That’s how you take your power back.

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Mike’s quote of the week: